GEORGE ZAMALEA - LET'S TALK

George Zamalea is a published author who lives in Mojave Desert of southeastern California, USA. His poems, short stories, and nonfiction have appeared online magazines and printing literary journals such as the Taft College Press, the Literary Yard, and the Scarlet Leaf Publishing House among others. In additional, he is an awarded author by the prestigious International Latino Book Awards.  He is currently working on “The God Gender”. 

LET'S TALK

An Article about Men & Women

    "We carry the message in many small, subtle, but powerful ways. We do our own recovery work and become a living demonstration of hope, self-love, comfort, and heath. These quiet behaviors can be a powerful message"[1]


What a fool I was to take you,
Pretty Love, into my household, 
Shape my days and nights to charm you,
Center all my hopes about you,
Knowing well I must outlive you,
If no trap or shotgun gets me. [2]

    
    Most days, women feel like a density cloud away from man, and there is no recycle to fill it with cute words or a 1-800-Flower buds to get it even. How did happen to the pretty details between woman and man? Unlike Machismo [3], which did not seem to know what was the problem or what was the reason we the man and we the woman little by little have begun to split each other.
    For the last five years, I found this split weird. It took me a week and three days to see that in the clubs, in the gyms, in the theaters, in the streets, in the freeways, as if the women were moving away from men's shadows, and nowhere did I find a drawn as curious as compelling with the couples, but I find women more attached to their girlfriends than men.
    It did not take me a minute to find out some reason why women have begun to be a solo minder in their daily routine. As a former student of California State University and a junkie-mushier in Hollywood and Santa Monica nightclubs I have known many women.
    And there I found this Costa Mesa resident worker and student, an aspirant soap opera, told me thing that pushed me back to the classics.
    Frustrated and humiliated, Beatriz Tocqueville retreated momentary from her own right.
    "Are men in general beasts?" she asked herself. "Yes, they are. It has not used to be when they're more sensitive and where the physical aspects never have been a problem. Now they seem too cute and too self-image."
    On that first moment in May as a curious bastard I was, I went to my way to get more about Woman's talk. Without leaving from 24 Fitness Foothill Ram I took more than 100 answers for this simply question: What happen between Woman & Man?
    A 25-year-old Californian girl Patricia H. Lewis felt that split is part of 'social tension' among man and woman competition in front of sexual independence, but the typical it is too much that the proclamation of survival where weakened mind have made it so complicate. It created, she added, an explicit adjustment in both sexes. This is obvious enough in the argumentation of Lewis, according to her it is not there anymore.
    "It's nothing personal really," she said with a mysterious smile across her sweating face as she was kicking the pedal of the 'climber' bicycle in front of me. "I've nothing what I have dream that I can get it. Have you read a book called, 'Polite Lie'? [4]'"No, I did not, I replied. She looked at me and shook her head. "That is the paradox about men!"
    It was nevertheless the risk of alienation that could incorporate in this new approach that Akira Longbirg did not want to take. A Project Specialist in a Research Firm in downtown, Los Angeles, she believed it has to do more about the choice of acting in some manner that is an indirect conflict with the personality of men and women’s discovery that could be said is the possibility that man has begun to act more selfish and he has withdrawn himself altogether from the classical relationship [5].
    "Man thinks that we are a sex machine," Akira said. Her head high as she hurled with defiant look toward me sitting in a Melrose leveled-street sidewalk café, Los Angeles, California, after I took my liberty to sit at her table as I began to ask her some questions: What happen between woman & Man? "They've us as an open-legged animal for that purpose."
    "I am not a 'sex-seeker'[6], but the woman who isn't breeding ground because of man and man has become an “asshole”. I am a freer woman. And you must believe it I can do whatever I please."
    By the similar impact of the relationship, she was unable to define her points of view as a challenger toward the distance between men and women.
    "Don't take me wrong, George," a 31-year-old Margarita López from North Hollywood said as she begged me not to print her full name; but in the last minutes, she changed her mind. "I love men. Rather than allow them to pull me into an underground or in a full release of passion, I always let him know what the options are. With no desire to give it back, I often inhibit it as a vulnerable bird. They do not deserve us to be dynamic as before, and that is 1960 storm. There are the beginning steps to eliminating any confusion. The reason is that men have changed a bit. They have become cocky, internet seekers."
    What is the reason of such changing? Could be an interpretation that opposes his existence but in recognition of woman’s new role and certainly that women have for the past fifteen years broken that invisible chain that attached to them as a false commitment by men.
    "I don't know what it is," Nicole P. Lingerie of South Gate with such experience of twenty-tree boyfriends and an-almost proposal marriage, said with such calm. "I've tried to find a modern love of what Ma and Pa felt from the first time when they met back in 1936. But I failed, and the chief of this is that man is filled with pig's waste!"
    Could be then a competing plot-plus confrontation in which there was a manipulated challenge in the rearing make-up women today.
    In full force, Noemi Maggar, who was proud to say she had a man with whom she loved and she had planned to marry him, she recognized often that harness.
    "Luckily for them!" she exclaimed as she was sitting around a table at Beverly Hills Mall, waiting for one of her girlfriends to arrive. "It will be nice to have two minds. It is because man’s minds create a powerful correction to any further mistakes. Equally, I accept, however, that man cannot handle it as before and we are losing patience in front of them. They are afraid in front of us who become stronger and smarter."
    However, Mary Knowless, Social Workers in the City of El Segundo, disagreed.
    "I haven’t tasted a man for five years now. I'm become aware of man's image problem. Maybe it was back to 1950s when men started calling us 'sweetheart', dearie', and so on, and it was reference to the truly attitude what they felt.  In the 1970s, everything had a drastic fall. From now on it is a track when I cannot see anyone with a good feeling what it must be. Better is to do it or not do it at all. Either way I am not into do it. Except for occasional TV Date Dying filled with foolishness. Believe me, I love cock, so what is the point?"
    That self-disclosure, that was how and to whom one lets himself or herself to have sex wishes, Kimberly Gayden did not see it as a sexual relationship or the real goal to let a man to take her to the bed and had sex with her. She either disagreed about Date Show.
    "I am a woman if I say otherwise," she said. "Not precisely the point to be dated and have a personal orgasm instead of submit myself into that thing", she said with a self-control mischief, sitting in Cal State University Library. "Well, it is. The way men have begun to behave toward us is awful. There is no escape.  This play-fouled thinker believed he is a believer. However, I think he is just a dig-headed soulless, and they manage themselves under that pressure the so-called 'man' before us. Nevertheless, women are a creature of union now. Since the history has begun to call history and women, I can tell you woman has begun to see herself more that a woman than a toy, thank a lot for the women's movement and the transformation of ourselves. The sensibility, this classical alternative happens where the self-worth of being what we are, they recognize now, I hope, not all is playing by the foolish being a man."
    What about respect? Who would make more roles among them? That is more freedom from the traditional supermodel that the man has created.
    Having gained the initiative, Carolyn Artuyunyan and Antoinette Melvin-Encino looked at me with uneasy gestures.
    "Wait-a-minute! We got all that and more," Carolyn said finally, sitting comfortably on a chair in Venice Beach front ashore. "We got that, sugar. I got a job and I got my own place and I got my own car and I can be a self-stimulation bitch (explicit) so do not pitch me, sugar pie. They are scared to us and we do not want to mess it with that big ego. The tell-it-like-it-or-not is man generation has gone. The transformation or the guilt is a reflection that men kept with themselves."
    "There is not going-on fire," Antoinette said. "Even though I do not sense myself as a romantic person, and this does not mean I am feeling so faithful supporting to have a man to bring this radiated past into my soul! The value is there, but men are loaded with bird’s seed and they are beginning to lose grounds."
    All attention went to Akiko Kuratoma.
    "Man is missing the point and I must say, for the first time from those past troubles to the present era of social media."
    There was more, and Jean R. Guon was hoping that discord of jealousy was just a detached point of view.
    "There are too many books of superhero," she said as she looked at me very seriously in the level-street coffee shop in Santa Monica City across Ocean Avenue. "However, there is none about female heroine who man has required to be called unique. Only men, and those who are mourning them, they still believe the happiness will not come with physical contact but with wordiness and incomprehension."
    To settle the matter and to find the reason for this statement, I went myself to Santa Barbara when my last teacher of Psychology lived. 
    I spoke with Lorraine Peoples-Miller. The 79-year-old woman, who for the safety and prosperity had received me with a smile, "It has been a long time," she said as I crossed the narrow hall and sat around at a table where she had already some Kroger crackers and milk.
    After an hour, the question surprised her again.
    "You've never given it up, haven't you, huh, George?"
    "No, Mrs. Peoples-Miller," I said. "And?"
    "Very well," she said after a long silence. "I don't have the answer as you should know... in my mind that's for the better. Yet women certainly have now a wide enough range of alternative roles to select from. No matter whether it can be accordingly or not, but she can demand for herself a 'cultured' amount freedom of mutual force."
    After a five-hour talking I was still not satisfied; but it was time to say goodbye.
    That is when I stood up, kissed her at both cheeks as I dared to take a last shot: "Who will be the winner in this battle?"
    "Us!" she said quickly, and smiling she added, "Whether that's the way I feel or not, you'll change or you will lose yourself under us!"


    Author's note

The individuals who have appeared in this article are real people. 
    Once again it is time to say how can I thank you all of you and be grateful and unique whatever you do.
    Blessing to my lovely Canadian French girl Abrielle, who always has encouraged me to write this with open heart, and here is what I came with. My sisters Isabel, Thaili, and my friends Frank, Carlos, Walter, etc.
    I am forever grateful to Scarlet Leaf Publication, the Internet magazine its staffs to have their time and their patience to read this and to publish this one and give me once again a piece of heaven for a near future. Thank you all of you!
    Thanks to my writer friends Gil, Hermann, Hana, Katherine Roteriosare, John Smittson, who argued with me that with the best questions I should be asking. Throwers politicized minds, indeed!
    Many thanks to my teachers Dr. Robert Haban and his wife Nancy during those wonderful moments of bla! Bla! bla!
    Many thanks to my professor Lorraine Peoples-Miller using always expression like "free man, free woman” that made me to do it right.
    Once again, I joyfully quote them and if there are some mistakes in their conversation, I will take all the responsibility as a bad listener as that damned recorder was always broken at right moment when I tried to copy from her.
    Well, let just say it is my fault.



    References Notes & Books


[1]Friedan, Betty, The Feminine Mystique, W.W. Norton & Company, New York/London, 1997, pp. 258-281; p338-378.


[2]Millay, Edna St. Vincent, Collected Poems, edited by Norma Millay, Harper & Row, Publishers, New York, 1949.

[3]This term is most suitable to Latino men rather than American males. The archetypal of super-hombre Latino; it is the traditional Hispanic male image. The notion could be sexuality in this rush society and also this is the notion that man is unable to be emotional expressive or involve in conation of weakness

[4]Mori, Kyoko, Polite Lies: On Being A Woman Caught Between Cultures, Henry Holt and Company, New York, 1997.


The Greatest is Love, Published by The World Home Bible League, 1967.
Borysenko, Joan, A Woman's Book of Life: The Biology, Psychology, and Spirituality of the Feminine Life Cycle, Riverhead Books. New York, 1996. 

Beattie, Melody, The Language of Letting Go: Daily Meditations for Codependents, A Hazelden Book, HarperCollinsPublishers, 1990, p.343


 [5] In our interview, she told me that she believed in Betty Friedan, the American writer who wrote the book named Feminine Mystique. Also she stated from a book called "The Greatest is Love" published by The World Home Bible League, the followed lines, Act 15:24 p188: 'We understand that some believers from here have upset you and questioned your salvation, but they had no such instruction from us.' In the way she said it I recognized she was upset against men in general. However, I have never a woman with such control and power in her voice that I did not notice it.
[6] This is term that Betty Friedan (1997) uses in her book, "The Feminine Mystique" that Akira has repeated it throughout our interview with a different meaning. "I did not do a Kinsey study," Friedan starts in Chapter 11 (The Sex-Seekers). But when I was on the trail of the problem that has no name, the suburban housewives I interviewed would often give me an explicitly sexual answer to a question that was not sexual at all." Friedan, Betty, "The Feminine Mystique", W.W.Norton & Company, Mew York/London, 1997, p258.