SCARLET LEAF REVIEW
  • HOME
    • PRIVACY POLICY
    • ABOUT
    • SUBMISSIONS
    • PARTNERS
    • CONTACT
  • 2022
    • ANNIVERSARY
    • JANUARY >
      • POEMS
      • SHORT-STORIES
      • NON-FICTION
  • 2021
    • ANNIVERSARY
    • JANUARY >
      • POEMS
      • SHORT-STORIES
      • NON-FICTION
    • FEBRUARY & MARCH >
      • POEMS
      • SHORT-STORIES
      • NON-FICTION
    • APR-MAY-JUN-JUL >
      • POEMS
      • SHORT-STORIES
      • NON-FICTION
      • ART
    • AUG-SEP >
      • POEMS
      • SHORT-STORIES
      • NON-FICTION
    • OCTOBER >
      • POEMS
      • SHORT-STORIES
      • NON-FICTION
    • NOV & DEC >
      • POEMS
      • SHORT-STORIES
      • NON-FICTION
  • 2020
    • DECEMBER >
      • POEMS
      • SHORT-STORIES
      • NON-FICTION
    • AUG-SEP-OCT-NOV >
      • POEMS
      • SHORT-STORIES
      • NON-FICTION
    • JULY >
      • POEMS
      • SHORT-STORIES
      • NON-FICTION
    • JUNE >
      • POEMS
      • SHORT-STORIES
      • NON-FICTION
    • MAY >
      • POEMS
      • SHORT-STORIES
      • NON-FICTION
    • APRIL >
      • POEMS
      • SHORT-STORIES
      • NON-FICTION
    • MARCH >
      • POEMS
      • SHORT-STORIES
      • NON-FICTION
    • FEBRUARY >
      • POEMS
      • SHORT-STORIES
      • NON-FICTION
    • JANUARY >
      • POEMS
      • SHORT-STORIES
      • NON-FICTION
    • ANNIVERSARY
  • 2019
    • DECEMBER >
      • POEMS
      • SHORT-STORIES
      • NON-FICTION
    • NOVEMBER >
      • POEMS
      • SHORT-STORIES
      • NON-FICTION
    • OCTOBER >
      • POEMS
      • SHORT-STORIES
      • NON-FICTION
    • SEPTEMBER >
      • POEMS
      • SHORT-STORIES
      • NON-FICTION
    • AUGUST >
      • POEMS
      • SHORT-STORIES
      • NONFICTION
      • ART
    • JULY 2019 >
      • POEMS
      • SHORT-STORIES
      • NON-FICTION
    • JUNE 2019 >
      • POEMS
      • SHORT-STORIES
      • NON-FICTION
    • ANNIVERSARY ISSUE >
      • SPECIAL DECEMBER >
        • ENGLISH
        • ROMANIAN
  • ARCHIVES
    • SHOWCASE
    • 2016 >
      • JAN&FEB 2016 >
        • Poems
        • Prose >
          • Essays
          • Short-Stories & Series
          • Non-Fiction
      • MARCH 2016 >
        • Poems
        • Short-Stories & Series
        • Essays & Interviews
        • Non-fiction
        • Art
      • APRIL 2016 >
        • Poems
        • Prose
      • MAY 2016 >
        • Poems
        • Short-Stories
        • Essays & Reviews
      • JUNE 2016 >
        • Poems
        • Short-Stories
        • Reviews & Essays & Non-Fiction
      • JULY 2016 >
        • Poems
        • Short-Stories
        • Non-Fiction
      • AUGUST 2016 >
        • Poems Aug 2016
        • Short-Stories Aug 2016
        • Non-fiction Aug 2016
      • SEPT 2016 >
        • Poems Sep 2016
        • Short-Stories Sep 2016
        • Non-fiction Sep 2016
      • OCT 2016 >
        • Poems Oct 2016
        • Short-Stories Oct 2016
        • Non-Fiction Oct 2016
      • NOV 2016 >
        • POEMS NOV 2016
        • SHORT-STORIES NOV 2016
        • NONFICTION NOV 2016
      • DEC 2016 >
        • POEMS DEC 2016
        • SHORT-STORIES DEC 2016
        • NONFICTION DEC 2016
    • 2017 >
      • ANNIVERSARY EDITION 2017
      • JAN 2017 >
        • POEMS
        • SHORT-STORIES
        • NONFICTION
      • FEB 2017 >
        • POEMS
        • SHORT-STORIES
        • NON-FICTION
      • MARCH 2017 >
        • POEMS
        • SHORT-STORIES
        • NON-FICTION
      • APRIL 2017 >
        • POEMS
        • SHORT-STORIES
        • NON-FICTION
      • MAY 2017 >
        • POEMS
        • SHORT-STORIES
        • NON-FICTION
      • JUNE 2017 >
        • POEMS
        • SHORT-STORIES
        • NON-FICTION
      • JULY 2017 >
        • POEMS
        • SHORT-STORIES
        • NON-FICTION
      • AUG 2017 >
        • POEMS
        • SHORT-STORIES
        • NON-FICTION
        • PLAY
      • SEPT 2017 >
        • POEMS
        • SHORT-STORIES
        • NONFICTION
      • OCT 2017 >
        • POEMS
        • SHORT-STORIES
        • NONFICTION
      • NOV 2017 >
        • POEMS
        • SHORT-STORIES
        • NONFICTION
      • DEC 2017 >
        • POEMS
        • SHORT-STORIES
        • NONFICTION
    • 2018 >
      • JAN 2018 >
        • POEMS
        • SHORT-STORIES
        • NONFICTION
      • FEB-MAR-APR 2018 >
        • POEMS
        • SHORT-STORIES
        • NON-FICTION
      • MAY 2018 >
        • POEMS
        • SHORT-STORIES
        • NON-FICTION
      • JUNE 2018 >
        • POEMS
        • SHORT-STORIES
        • NONFICTION
      • JULY 2018 >
        • POEMS
        • SHORT-STORIES
        • NONFICTION
      • AUG 2018 >
        • POEMS
        • SHORT-STORIES
        • NONFICTION
      • SEP 2018 >
        • POEMS
        • SHORT-STORIES
        • NONFICTION
      • OCT 2018 >
        • POEMS
        • SHORT-STORIES
        • NON-FICTION
      • NOV-DEC 2018 >
        • POEMS
        • SHORT-STORIES
        • NON-FICTION
      • ANNIVERSARY 2018
    • 2019 >
      • JAN 2019 >
        • POEMS
        • SHORT-STORIES
        • NONFICTION
      • FEB 2019 >
        • POEMS
        • SHORT-STORIES
        • NON-FICTION
      • MARCH-APR 2019 >
        • POEMS
        • SHORT-STORIES
        • NON-FICTION
      • MAY 2019 >
        • POEMS
        • SHORT-STORIES
        • NON-FICTION
  • BOOKSHOP
  • RELEASES
  • INTERVIEWS
  • REVIEWS

JOHN TUSTIN - POEMS

4/1/2021

0 Comments

 
Picture
John Tustin’s poetry has appeared in many disparate literary journals in the last thirteen years. fritzware.com/johntustinpoetry contains links to his published poetry online.

​EXPOSE

​I remember how it was snowing outside that night,
An actual blizzard, streets impassible,
My house almost warm
As I held you by the waist
And kissed you hard.
How well you kissed me back.
 
No children or jobs that night.
Nothing but us.
 
Tonight I drink the same beer as we did
That night
And I love you with the same passion
Although you are not here with me
And never will be.
Me, alone in the snowless winter
With nothing but hours
And memories of us
Kissing and listening to music
As the snow fell and fell
Under the attentive streetlamps
Of Floral Park.
 
I’m listening to music now,
Different than the music we listened to
That night
But I know you would like it.
Everyone likes Johnny Cash
And I know you are no exception to that.
 
I wish it was snowing
And I wish you were lying beside me
And I wish you were as drunk as me
And I wish the morning light
Would never break through
In a few hours
 
And expose.

 

​GOODBYE, LAUREN

​It was a year ago we first began to talk on the phone
And made our plans to meet.
She worked assisting surgeons in a hospital two hours away
And she was a lot younger than me.
So many women are now.
It’s terrifying.

She liked Dave Matthews but I didn’t hold that against her.
 
We made our plans and our conversations got hotter leading up
To the day.
She was pretty, I liked her personality and she was going to drive two hours
To come to me!
All those hours on the phone, we knew each other a bit,
Plus the messaging on social media.
It was going to happen.
It was going to happen!
 
I was so nervous I could hardly sleep the night before.
I woke up to find a text telling me,
“Morning…I woke up feeling like shit.
Fever, sore throat, can (sic) breathe.”
The funny thing was a few hours later I had the same symptoms.
Half the State had the flu.
At first I thought she changed her mind about meeting me
But I convinced myself that this time was different.
We just talked so freely and easily. We matched.
 
This time was no different.
 
I texted her a few times that day and she never responded.
I went to Facebook the next day and she had me blocked.
So
That was that.
Again.
I called her once and left a message saying that
I was sorry she changed her mind,
 
Then I deleted her phone number.
I said, Goodbye, Lauren.
Your name is now on a list that keeps growing
And growing.
 
I still think about her once in a while.
 
What else do I have to do?
 

​I AM NOT A MESSENGER

​I am not a messenger
And I am not a monster
 
There are demons within me
Squelched with but a look from you
 
The sickness the sadness of me
Shrivels and shudders smaller with each day you are with
me
 
I am not a question
And I am certainly not an answer
 
Walls rise between us
Rivers pulse through us
 
The walls cannot resist these rivers
And they fall
 
I am simply the father of my children
I am nothing else but your lover
 
I am quite content to be these two things
These two things and nothing else
 
As we contemplate side by side
Smiling in the darkness and the silence, reveling in the beauty of each other


​ON HEARING SUZANNE VEGA’S GYPSY FOR THE FIRST TIME IN TWENTY YEARS

​And there you are
after almost twenty years,
as beautiful and awkward
still
as that song that makes me think of you.
 
My thoughts of you
are only tender now.
 
The complexity of your mind.
The simplicity and depth of your compassion.
 
Your eyes that revealed
your kindness and
your sadness
 
as you forgave me
unflinchingly
my profundity
and absorbed
my callous selfishness
 
with the downcast eyes
of a drizzling day.
 
You were a puzzle
I couldn’t complete,
 
staring dumbfounded,
scratching my head
like an ape.
 
And there you are
lying on your bed
listening to my attempts
at poetry, at philosophy,
knowing more than you say
but holding it in.
 
You remain unrevealed.
 
And there you are,
reaching out to me with half a heart –
 
as I remember why
I loved you in the first place
 
and why I left.
 

​YOUR GARLANDS OF HAIR

​Your garlands of hair
Deep dark damp upon my sight
Pouncing vision you
In this wake dream
This drunk doze
 
Day is gray meander
Night is purple wander
Bed made of tears
Sheets of sorrow
Connected to the sear of the rain
Here
 
I drown in the comfort
Of blankets
 
Your garnets of eyes
Hot tempered flames
Obsidian
Blazing in my pockets
I bring them out
They glow on the sleepless ceiling
They are tempered steel
They are melted coins
They are my closing eyes
Still seeing
 
Drat
Incongruous lips
Kissing me
When black is blackest
When shades shade in deadest night
 
Kiss me in yellow of day
The world will spin still
Our scars as transcendent in sunlight
 
As supple in moonlight
Upon the moaning
Hallelujah
Sheets
 
Your garlands of hair
Devouring pillows
My disappearing fingers
In miraculousness
The concomitant
Of my paramour
My other
 
My better
My equal
My bowed apologist
 
The sound of shovels
Attempting to dig us out of our fairytale
Finally
Dormant
To sanguine
Newly ruddy
Newfangled
Finally realized
Ears
 
Let the songs play
My mouth on your mouth
Eyes in eyes
Bodies melted
Thus
Together
In flame
 
 
0 Comments

    Categories

    All
    ALETHEA JIMISON
    ALEX ANDY PHUONG
    ALFRED NICHOLSON
    ALLAN LAKE
    ANNA KAPUNGU
    ANTHONY WARD
    BOBBY Z
    DOUGLAS J. LANZO
    DR. DOUGLAS YOUNG
    EDDIE JONES
    EDITH-MARIE GREEN
    EDWARD FERRARI
    FABRICE POUSSIN
    FREDERICK POLLACK
    GUNA MORAN
    JAMES CROAL JACKSON
    JEFFREY CLAP
    JOHN TUSTIN
    JOHN VALENTINE
    JONATHAN CORLE (JON)
    JOSEPH S. PETE
    KEITH BURKHOLDER
    LOIS GREENE STONE
    MICHAEL LEE JOHNSON
    MICHAEL SUMMERLEIGH
    MICHELE REALE
    NDABA SIBANDA
    NGOZI OLIVIA OSUOHA
    PAOLO MARIA ROCCO
    PREETH GANAPATHY
    REY ARMENTEROS
    RIZWAN AKHTAR
    ROBERT ROTHMAN
    RON TORRENCE
    SARA KIL
    SATYAKI MUKHERJEE
    SOCHUKWU IVYE
    TARA DAVOODI
    THOMAS JOSEPH
    TYLER KERSHAW
    WES MCDANIEL

    RSS Feed

Powered by Create your own unique website with customizable templates.
  • HOME
    • PRIVACY POLICY
    • ABOUT
    • SUBMISSIONS
    • PARTNERS
    • CONTACT
  • 2022
    • ANNIVERSARY
    • JANUARY >
      • POEMS
      • SHORT-STORIES
      • NON-FICTION
  • 2021
    • ANNIVERSARY
    • JANUARY >
      • POEMS
      • SHORT-STORIES
      • NON-FICTION
    • FEBRUARY & MARCH >
      • POEMS
      • SHORT-STORIES
      • NON-FICTION
    • APR-MAY-JUN-JUL >
      • POEMS
      • SHORT-STORIES
      • NON-FICTION
      • ART
    • AUG-SEP >
      • POEMS
      • SHORT-STORIES
      • NON-FICTION
    • OCTOBER >
      • POEMS
      • SHORT-STORIES
      • NON-FICTION
    • NOV & DEC >
      • POEMS
      • SHORT-STORIES
      • NON-FICTION
  • 2020
    • DECEMBER >
      • POEMS
      • SHORT-STORIES
      • NON-FICTION
    • AUG-SEP-OCT-NOV >
      • POEMS
      • SHORT-STORIES
      • NON-FICTION
    • JULY >
      • POEMS
      • SHORT-STORIES
      • NON-FICTION
    • JUNE >
      • POEMS
      • SHORT-STORIES
      • NON-FICTION
    • MAY >
      • POEMS
      • SHORT-STORIES
      • NON-FICTION
    • APRIL >
      • POEMS
      • SHORT-STORIES
      • NON-FICTION
    • MARCH >
      • POEMS
      • SHORT-STORIES
      • NON-FICTION
    • FEBRUARY >
      • POEMS
      • SHORT-STORIES
      • NON-FICTION
    • JANUARY >
      • POEMS
      • SHORT-STORIES
      • NON-FICTION
    • ANNIVERSARY
  • 2019
    • DECEMBER >
      • POEMS
      • SHORT-STORIES
      • NON-FICTION
    • NOVEMBER >
      • POEMS
      • SHORT-STORIES
      • NON-FICTION
    • OCTOBER >
      • POEMS
      • SHORT-STORIES
      • NON-FICTION
    • SEPTEMBER >
      • POEMS
      • SHORT-STORIES
      • NON-FICTION
    • AUGUST >
      • POEMS
      • SHORT-STORIES
      • NONFICTION
      • ART
    • JULY 2019 >
      • POEMS
      • SHORT-STORIES
      • NON-FICTION
    • JUNE 2019 >
      • POEMS
      • SHORT-STORIES
      • NON-FICTION
    • ANNIVERSARY ISSUE >
      • SPECIAL DECEMBER >
        • ENGLISH
        • ROMANIAN
  • ARCHIVES
    • SHOWCASE
    • 2016 >
      • JAN&FEB 2016 >
        • Poems
        • Prose >
          • Essays
          • Short-Stories & Series
          • Non-Fiction
      • MARCH 2016 >
        • Poems
        • Short-Stories & Series
        • Essays & Interviews
        • Non-fiction
        • Art
      • APRIL 2016 >
        • Poems
        • Prose
      • MAY 2016 >
        • Poems
        • Short-Stories
        • Essays & Reviews
      • JUNE 2016 >
        • Poems
        • Short-Stories
        • Reviews & Essays & Non-Fiction
      • JULY 2016 >
        • Poems
        • Short-Stories
        • Non-Fiction
      • AUGUST 2016 >
        • Poems Aug 2016
        • Short-Stories Aug 2016
        • Non-fiction Aug 2016
      • SEPT 2016 >
        • Poems Sep 2016
        • Short-Stories Sep 2016
        • Non-fiction Sep 2016
      • OCT 2016 >
        • Poems Oct 2016
        • Short-Stories Oct 2016
        • Non-Fiction Oct 2016
      • NOV 2016 >
        • POEMS NOV 2016
        • SHORT-STORIES NOV 2016
        • NONFICTION NOV 2016
      • DEC 2016 >
        • POEMS DEC 2016
        • SHORT-STORIES DEC 2016
        • NONFICTION DEC 2016
    • 2017 >
      • ANNIVERSARY EDITION 2017
      • JAN 2017 >
        • POEMS
        • SHORT-STORIES
        • NONFICTION
      • FEB 2017 >
        • POEMS
        • SHORT-STORIES
        • NON-FICTION
      • MARCH 2017 >
        • POEMS
        • SHORT-STORIES
        • NON-FICTION
      • APRIL 2017 >
        • POEMS
        • SHORT-STORIES
        • NON-FICTION
      • MAY 2017 >
        • POEMS
        • SHORT-STORIES
        • NON-FICTION
      • JUNE 2017 >
        • POEMS
        • SHORT-STORIES
        • NON-FICTION
      • JULY 2017 >
        • POEMS
        • SHORT-STORIES
        • NON-FICTION
      • AUG 2017 >
        • POEMS
        • SHORT-STORIES
        • NON-FICTION
        • PLAY
      • SEPT 2017 >
        • POEMS
        • SHORT-STORIES
        • NONFICTION
      • OCT 2017 >
        • POEMS
        • SHORT-STORIES
        • NONFICTION
      • NOV 2017 >
        • POEMS
        • SHORT-STORIES
        • NONFICTION
      • DEC 2017 >
        • POEMS
        • SHORT-STORIES
        • NONFICTION
    • 2018 >
      • JAN 2018 >
        • POEMS
        • SHORT-STORIES
        • NONFICTION
      • FEB-MAR-APR 2018 >
        • POEMS
        • SHORT-STORIES
        • NON-FICTION
      • MAY 2018 >
        • POEMS
        • SHORT-STORIES
        • NON-FICTION
      • JUNE 2018 >
        • POEMS
        • SHORT-STORIES
        • NONFICTION
      • JULY 2018 >
        • POEMS
        • SHORT-STORIES
        • NONFICTION
      • AUG 2018 >
        • POEMS
        • SHORT-STORIES
        • NONFICTION
      • SEP 2018 >
        • POEMS
        • SHORT-STORIES
        • NONFICTION
      • OCT 2018 >
        • POEMS
        • SHORT-STORIES
        • NON-FICTION
      • NOV-DEC 2018 >
        • POEMS
        • SHORT-STORIES
        • NON-FICTION
      • ANNIVERSARY 2018
    • 2019 >
      • JAN 2019 >
        • POEMS
        • SHORT-STORIES
        • NONFICTION
      • FEB 2019 >
        • POEMS
        • SHORT-STORIES
        • NON-FICTION
      • MARCH-APR 2019 >
        • POEMS
        • SHORT-STORIES
        • NON-FICTION
      • MAY 2019 >
        • POEMS
        • SHORT-STORIES
        • NON-FICTION
  • BOOKSHOP
  • RELEASES
  • INTERVIEWS
  • REVIEWS