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BLESSING CULVER - POEMS

11/25/2020

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Picture
Blessing Culver lives in Indiana and is a current student at Hanover College. She is studying Art and English and hopes, one day, if possible, to make a living doing something creative. Blessing spends her free time reading, writing, and drawing. She has also been published in Eunoia Review.  

Denatured
​

​From tragedy's wake I become
As an outcast- unwanted and numb
As a vagrant- transient and momentary
My emotions diverge volatile and varied-
From heightened sensation to callosity
My Family- I regarded with animosity
My Friendships I destroyed with hostile nature-
And in all I am- I am denatured-
Then- in my tragedy- in the establishing
Of a bitter life- was acquiring
From all intensity of fortune and fate
The hope that holds me secretly elate-
From the river, or the flood abhorrest-
From the green silence of the forest-
From the constant wheel in the sky
In its alarming passing by and by-
From the roar of the ocean
As it gives me wondering notion-
From the crash, and the burning-
And the woman who was yearning
(When the whole world around was broken)
For a sense of rhyme and reason-
 
-Imitation of "Alone" by Edgar Allan Poe
 
 

Lonely 
​

Past the grassy field
Lies a lonely cliff.
And past the cliff lies a
green ocean.
And hovering above the ocean
is a salty mist.
And behind the mist is a
blue horizon.
Above the horizon
Clouds and sky diverge.
In the divergence lies a
Heaven full of stars.
And beyond the stars is an
Infinite universe.
 
 

You’re Beautiful
​

​You’re beautiful because you
remind me of myself
And I’m
a little
self-obsessed
 
But you’re
Also
self-obsessed
so you admire
me too
 
And that
makes you
Even more
beautiful
To me.
 

“More, far more, will I achieve”
​

I want the moon.
I want to swallow it whole
So no one else can have it.
 
Light will radiate from me
And blind everyone so they stay away and
Never come near.
 
I want to be so alone that I no longer have
To think but just exist
as my complete self.
 
I want to die young and never grow old
And become like everyone else,
Broken and corrupted.
 
I want to go wrong in my own way
Instead of going right in someone else's
And only care about what I think of myself.
 
I want no one to ever love me so my soul can be mine alone
And nothing can have power of it
And only I own it.
 
I want to chase after the wind.
I want to catch it and pin it down and tear off its mask
And make it tell me things.
 
I want the very ground I walk on to worship me
And then I want to worship it back
By sinking into it forever.
 
I want to fall off the edge of the world and
See what has never been seen and
Know what has never been known.
 
I want to feel what its like to get my head cut off or what its like
To be crushed by a concrete roller.
I want to drown in a green ocean of foam and salt
 
And then I want to feel what it’s like to be eaten alive.
I want to crawl inside a dead body and eat the decomposing liver
That lies within and experience ecstasy while I do it.
 
I want to be hollow and then I want to be full.
I want all of my relationships to break apart and
Crumble into nothing.
 
I want winter to last forever so the frozen darkness I feel
Can spread to everyone else.
I want to murder everyone and then die myself.
 
I want there to be no reality
And only the self, existing forever,
Alone in time and space.

Driving a Car
​

​The man drives a car,
He wants to go far.
He does not know where,
But he feels the air.
With no directions
There's no reflections.
Just going forward,
And onward toward,
Empty existence,
There's no resistance.
No thinking or thoughts
Just life without knots.
He laughs and he cries,
His heart never dies,
As long as he drives,
His old hope survives.
He wants to go on,
Into the new dawn.
And he’ll never stop,
And his heart won’t drop,
If he decides to
Accept his own cue,
He’ll stay forever
On this endeavor.
He wants to keep going,
And being unknowing.
 
 
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